I stopped watching the show awhile back, but this is still SHOCKING APPRENTICE NEWS!!! Sweet Caroline Kepcher, the lone voice of reason in the boardroom, has been let go. Dismissed. Told that her services will no longer be required. Donald's sorry, but you just don't fit in. This would be the straw that broke my will to sit through an hour of Trumpiness every week, were it not for the fact alluded to before, i.e., my will has been broken for awhile now. Oh, and speaking of Will, is Chilltown going to continue their winning ways tonight, or is the double eviction storm that will turn the house upside down that Julie Chen was telling us about send him and/or Mike Boogie packing? OH, and I've also got a guess at what crazy, outrageous, cutting-edge topical presenter pairing will be the talk of tonight's VMA's: John Mark Karr and Suri Cruise. Seems improbable, I know, but you'da said the same thing before that Michael Jackson/Lisa Marie Presley deal a few years back, right? [UPDATE, 9/1: Oops. I guess I haven't seen the show for the past 3 years or so and had not realized that it is now 100% sad. Two observations on the sadness: 1) Jack Black never should have become a leading man, if he'd stayed in supporting roles that schtick might well still be hilarious. As it is... 2) It's cool that the big look for the kids (and all the bands they're buddies with on MySpace) now is Goth, cuz those Goths always did have pretty great taste in music... oh wait, I was thinking of the Mods or something, other than Siouxsie and the Banshees all the bands those death rockers used to listen to were embarrassingly weak. Plus the actual music those bands were playing last night didn't sound much different from the crap 'rock' bands were playing in the late nineties, they just wear makeup and top hats now).

Boring fire investigator Pat Bigelow said of Thursday's fire: "This is definitely a very suspicious situation. It is a set fire."

Yawn... ho-hum. Wake me when something interesting burns.


(Yep, that's the joke, all right. Get to laughing.)

Pagans dead end america

Mike Carroll, 'Yeah Right'

Heino - Blau Blueht Der Enzian

"No luck so far but one day I'll possess Heaven's fire and then no zoning board will be able to tell me where I can and cannot shoot ducks."

The DAYDREAMER - Rankin Bass

I Bet Rosie $20 She Couldn't Drink 16 oz. of Ketchup

to boston
Originally uploaded by Rosie O'Donnell.

...and it was worth every penny.

BREAKING OTTER MISCHEVIOUSNESS!!!
With murky water almost up to her waist, Vanon reached Wiley, 3, and began punching the otter in the face...

hulk. mad.

hulk. mad.
Originally uploaded by sfrances.

Hey, would you like to hear some songs about squirrels? I mean, of course you would, duh, who wouldn't... let me start over. There are several songs about squirrels posted here on the WFMU site, and you can download them by right-clicking (or control-clicking) and downloading the linked file. You know, like how you normally download mp3s and such off websites. Except they're not usually songs about squirrels. But this time they will be. Nuff said.

Altered Images - Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday, dear Frances, happy birthday to you!!!!!

HEY, I can't believe I missed the beginning of this story, but: THERE IS BREAKING SAUSAGE NEWS OUT OF MILWAUKEE. Specifically racing sausage news... you'll have to dig back into the archives here on your own, or just do some googlin', if you want to relive the racing sausage news of the past but I can provide a quick recap. During Milwaukee Brewers baseball games they have a race between people dressed as various wursts and wieners; there's a bratwurst, a hot dog, an Italian sausage, and a Polish. A few years ago Randall Simon, a player from the opposing team, playfully tapped one of them with his bat when they ran by his dugout, causing her to fall down and hurt herself and it was a big brew-ha-ha (ha ha). But the racer got to go to Aruba or somewhere where they decreed "Injured Sausage Day" and got feted like a queen (or something like that) and then she retired after the following season to great fanfare. Which was how things stood until this past Saturday when a new runner stepped into the blocks for the very first time: THE CHORIZO. I think he won (note: there's chorizo video footage available at that link there), but now they've pulled him from participating in any more races this season. Find out more by following the links, and of course it should go without saying that we will be keeping a watchful eye on Wisconsin for any nuevo Cerveceros salchicha noticias.

we've got a FUZZBOX and we're gonna use it!