I'm gonna be busy for awhile today, but I've got this joke for you to enjoy from the 1952 Parts Pups Jokebook.

Teacher: Johnny, why are you late?
Johnny: I had to wash the #$!!X dishes!
Teacher: Johnny! It's nice of you to help your mother, but that awful language is unnecessary. Let us continue our geography lesson. Johnny, where is the Mexican border?
Johnny: Upstairs with mama - that's why I had to wash the #$!!X dishes!