The site which was selling those Garden Swingers I wrote about a few weeks ago has countless other whimsical collectibles to offer as well, and today I'd like to direct your attention to some figurines of the elderly. There are two lines of these competing for the non-prescription drug portion of grandma's Social Security check, Coots and Biddies and You're Never Too Old. The latter I actually find semi-sweet, but the former strays into the same bothersome territory inhabited by Mindy's grandmother (Cora the Hudson) on Mork & Mindy, with her habit of roller-skating around wearing radio headphones while wearing a glitter transfer t-shirt that says something like "Sexy Roller Disco Grandma". Now don't get me wrong, I don't find anything at all wrong with anybody of any age doing whatever they want, it's the act of proclaiming that you are a hip and with-it old biddy (or coot) that I find off-putting. Anyhow, I seem to have gotten side-tracked from my original purpose with this post, which was to point out that one of these collectible artisans has ripped off the other one, and I fear we may see a return to the dark days of the tchotske wars of the late seventies which ultimately led to the grisly discovery of Russ Berrie's lifeless body lying in the driveway of his Palisades Park home, impaled by a giant screw.